27 December 2007

Mr. Magoo and Contacts

I remember it well. It was January 6, 1992. I began my Master's degree at the University of Florida and needed to get a new driver's license.

It was the first test I flunked. There was no Bell Curve. There was no extra credit. Unless one memorized it, like many non-English speaking landscape workers. There was only one solution- go see the eye doctor and get glasses.

That is what I did. and came back a week later and got my driver's license. I firmly believe that I could have been a straight-A student during my undergraduate years had my vision been corrected then. I should sue someone...
Anyway, after years of fumbling with glasses, prescription sunglasses and not wanting to fork over 4 grand for eye surgery, I looked into contacts. No pun intended.

It has been two weeks since I began wearing them, and it has been a very positive experience.

Here are some changes I have had to make:

1. Don't wear your prescription sunglasses when you are wearing contacts. Things are EXTREMELY blurry!

2. You get to buy inexpensive sunglasses at the gas station now.

3. You get to walk in the rain again and not worry about the glasses getting wet.

4. You get to walk into or out of a building and glasses don't get foggy.

5. When working outside, your contacts won't slide down your sweatty nose and face.

6. Wear protective eyewear. My old glasses that I wore when working outside doubled as protective eyewear, as they were issued by the military. The other day I learned the hard way that I needed to wear goggle while cutting some wood. I could see clearly, and thought I was wearing my glasses. I wasn't, and spent the next few minutes rinsing!

7. I can now put a pencil behind my ear when working on my MPs (man-projects).

8. Those unsightly chronic nose-indentions are going away!

9. I won't have to use those silly 'flip-up' sunglasses when I lose my prescription glasses!

10. Touching my eyeballs is not as bad as I thought it would be.

No more Mr. Magoo!

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